The Clusterfuck That Was The VMAs

So, where to begin?

Well, the VMAs have officially jumped the shark. By now y'all know Britney opened the show. Ruben from That Other Blog pretty much summed up my feelings:

Britney's Failed Comeback

Watch the Britney fiasco and judge for yourself. I seriously got douche chills and had to turn away from the TV.



And what Britney post can be complete with out a coochie shot?



Ewww. Now I'm starting to feel sorry for her.

I hated the whole show except for Sara Silverman's bit. She's my new hero.



Sarah Silverman's Monologue

The whole show was so confusing with all the performances in different suites. It just didn't flow and was boring and filled with the most obnoxious people on the planet. We get it Kanye. You're too cool for the room with your dumb sunglasses.



Jackass. You look like Max Headroom from the 80s Coke commercials with extra melanin.



And does anyone buy this rivalry with 50 Cent? Yeah, me either. It's hard to take a man who stands on his tippie toes seriously.



And speaking of looking stupid, good God there was some ugly ensembles on these people. First off, who the fuck is Li'l Mama? You know, it doesn't matter - look what this bitch wore in public:



What's sad is she probably thought it looked good. But have oversized satin baby outfits really been in style? Have they?

And that rotten old queen John Norris finally fell out of the closet with his goddamn guyliner and frosted hair.



And who is this kid? His face is so smackable, and he looks like Shooter McGavin's kid.





So as far as red carpet fashion, it was mediocre. I didn't care for Beyonce's dress.



But at least she didn't wear this:



I guess there were a few highlights. I liked Chris Brown's, Rhianna's, Justin Timberlake's & Timbaland's performances.





And a few people classed it up -

Mrs. Affleck looked great although she was completely out of her element. Soccer moms shouldn't go to the VMAs.



And damn, Dr. Dre and 50 Cent looked fine as hell. Robyn & I added them to our fuckable black dude list.





However, this was my favorite part. They should've just showed this and rolled credits.



What do you think of the show?