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Sunday, January 20, 2008

Jan Terri: Pure Sex

So D-listed's Hot Slut of the week is Jan Terri. Never heard of her? Me either, but you HAVE TO see this mess. She is Diane from Fat Camp in 30 years. I love her.

Apparently, Jan Terri was some sort of singer in the 80s and 90s, and she made a few horrific videos. Please watch them. They are like a train wreck - just awful but you can't take you're eyes off of it. Here is "Little Brother", an atrocious mash up of two stupid songs that together make up one giant turd:



Where do I start with this masterpiece? Well, first off, she needs a new career. She sings worse than Britney hopped up on Boone's Farm and lithium, but I do give her credit. Her writing skills aren't worse than Britney's. And if you know me, you know i can't write this without mentioning the abomination that is the hair and 80s clothes. I'm still trying to figure out how old this chick is. She has the hair and the body of a 70 year old diabetic grandmother, but she doesn't really dress like one. I'm so confused!! I think my favorite part is when she points at a cruise ship when she sings the words "cruise ship" just in case you don't know what she's talking about. However, she scores points because her love interest has an AC Slater mullet and is completely dressed in acid washed denim which makes me giggle. And she looks like Winston, and I am in love with Winston.

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Here's another video that's even more craptastic:



Jesus, I don't know what's sexier, her bunt in those leather pants or her squatty midget legs in those boots. Hotness. My favorite part of this one is near 2:30 where the camera tries to go in for a close up of her face, but the camera zooms in on the concrete wall and then pans over to her like "fine, i'll do my camera thing and film this twat even though I'm terrified of that mug". Jan Terri, you rule bitch!

Scott Barnes

The best make-up artist ever now has his own cosmetic line! Scott does amazing make up for Jennifer Lopez, Lucy Liu, Kate Hudson, Julianne Moore, etc. He is credited with the "J.Lo glow" using bronzer and shimmer to contour the face and body. I bought his Glow Box, Body Bling Platinum, and Eye Ice at scottbarnes.com

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The Glow Box includes 5 hydrating masks, loose powder in Diamond Dust, super Luscious mascara, bronze in St. Tropez, and Flossy Glossy in Wishing (clear), Heavenly (pinkish gld), and Pretty Penny (copper). These colors go wih any skin tone. They even look good on me, and I have really fair skin.

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I loved the original Body Bling, but Body Bling Platinum is much better. It's designed for more fair skin, and seems to blend easier thank the original.

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And Eye Ice is a gorgeous eyeshadow. I got Serpentine, a dark brown, that will give you a beautiful smokey eye with just the right amount of shimmer. I also use it as an eyeliner.

So far I've really been impressed with this line, and I think I'm going to try the concealer and foundation next so look for the reviews!

Friday, January 18, 2008

I'm Moving!

I finally found a new apartment in Little Rock, and I'll be moving the last week of February. I HATE moving, so I'm going to make my brother and his friends move me (yes you are Justin, Scott, & Nick) while I shop for new furniture and stuff. So I went to Pottery Barn last week, and I've decided to decorate in a Tuscan villa-ish style with lots of color.

My kitchen has black granite counters and stainless steel appliances, so I've decided to go with orange for the kitchen. I ordered some beautiful orange, yellow & green dishes from a lady I work with, and I'll post pictures when they come in.

For the dining room, I'm going to decorate around a chandelier I bought but never used. It's a white wrought iron lamp with purple, pink, amber, and clear rosettes. I got it from Lamps Plus and here's a picture:

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Here are my new dining room table and chairs:

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Although the dining room is separate from the kitchen, I wanted the rooms to flow well, so I got the black wrought iron chairs to go with the kitchen and the white cushions to go with the chandelier. If I can find some I like, I want either purple or amber glass dinnerware for the table.

I'm going to decorate my living room in green, yellow, red, & orange. I haven't decided on a couch yet. White would really look good, but I don' think I want white with the puppies around. Slipcovers may be an option, but I don't know yet. Anyway, here are the pillows & throws I got for the sofas & chairs:

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I also got these cute little jugs and some glass vases to put flowers and plants in.

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For the living room wall, I got several sets of these dishes,

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and I'm going to hang them on the wall overlapping each other but at different distances from he wall which makes it 3D looking. It's gorgeous!

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I haven't thought about the bathrooms and bedrooms yet, but I know I want this linen cabinet for my bathroom:

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I'm thinking green and white for my room because it will look really pretty with the dark wood, but I haven't completely made up my mind yet. I'll post my new stuff and ideas later.

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Bond No. 9

I have completely fallen in love with the Bond No. 9. This fragrance line pays homage to New York City as every perfume is named after an area or street there. I've read many awesome reviews of this perfume house, but never really tried it mostly because I couldn't find any place in Arkansas that sold it. Well, I finally found Powder & Smoke in West Little Rock after lots of internet searching, and they sold the complete collection. After an hour of perfume chat with little old saleslady (she was so cute and had an adorable white shi tzu puppy), I couldn't make up my mind if I wanted Chinatown or Chelsea Flowers. So I got them both!

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Chinatown is my favorite Bond scent with notes of peach blossom, gardenia, tuberose, patchouli, & cardamom. It's very spicy and perfect for winter. It also lasts a long time and smells even better the longer I wear it.

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Chelsea Flowers is another favorite with notes of white hyacinth, white peony, musk, & dewy fresh-picked blooms. It's very soft and feminine.

These perfumes tend to be expensive, but they are well worth it especially if you have a passion for perfume. You can check out all of the scents and order off their website if you don't have a store near you at Bond No. 9 .

TheBalm & Lip Lingerie

I recently purchased a beatiful eye pallette and a hot new lip gloss from two brands I've never used before. TheBalm has some of the best eyeshadow I've ever used. I love it even more thatn MAC and Too Faced. The pallette I bought is called BalmVoyage - one of Sephora's beauty must-haves.

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The colors include Shady Lady Eyeshadow in Luscious Lani, Shady Lady shadow/liner in Caught in the Act Courtney, and Hot Mama Shadow/Blush along with an adorable luggage tag to make your suitcase stand out in the crowd. My favorite shade is Caught in the Act Courtney which is a dark brown with gold shimmer. It's perfect for making smokey eyes, and I sometimes use it as eyeliner. I've been wearing it everyday for a week. It's just beautiful. You can find all TheBalm products at Sephora.

I also picked up some new lip gloss from Dianne Brill's line, Lip Lingerie. I bought Camisole Ribbon a beautiful sheer pink.

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The gloss is very long-lasting, and it makes your lips so soft. And it smells like peaches. You can check out Dianne's line here: Dianne Brill Cosmetics

I will definitely be buying more from TheBalm & Dianne Brill, and I'll post reviews of those later.

What The F, Bill?

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So, I came across this story yesterday:

Bill Gates, Antichrist

Is this fucker serious? I can't even get my mind around how a computer could monitor your brain, body temperature, & facial expressions. How does that even work? Do you have to have be hooked up to electrodes or those little heart montior sticker things they put on you in the hospital then plug them into the computer? How the fuck can you do your job with wires all over you? You couldn't even move. I would be so distracted by the wires, I wouldn't even be able to do anything. Everybody would be so pissed off and frustrated all the time. Second, who would approve this patent? Well, maybe Bush would, but thank God he will be out of office this year, and he won't be able to slip this one into the Patriot Act. What the hell is wrong with people? What kind of insecure control freak would even want to do this to people? Bill, you're insane.

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Nerdy douche. Go shit in your hat!